A colleague of mine was getting married-the invitation read that the wedding would take place from approximately 8:47-11:42 on a Sunday morning. Apparently Sri Lankans visit some type of religous fortune tellers to learn when to please the Gods and special events can sometimes take place at the oddest of hours. My favorite story was of the head of an NGO having to give an argument as to why an opening ceremony of a school was best not to take place at 2am, but rather during the day. Her staff was not pleased by her not following religous orders.
I was unable to attend the wedding event, but was able to attend the reception that took place the following Sunday. I was told I should go and I must wear saree-sometimes written sari.
The saree is the 3 meter piece of fabric that you always see Indian women wrapped up in. The experience taught me there is much involved with the saree wrapping process. First, you have to find out what the occassion is for-in my case the main question was whether it was for a Hindu or Christian wedding or reception?Then you go to a fabric store, choose the fabric you want. Then you spend at least a half hour haggling over the price-even more if you're a foreigner.
After this, you take the fabric to a tailor-usually located on the second floor of where you bought the fabric or, in my case, across the street. You wait amongst strewn pieces of fabric and men working on sewing machines while the boss negotiates styles and cuts with women having saree tops and shelvar kamis custom made for them. There's no fan or air conditioning and everyone is covered in sweat...there's an actual truth behind the name 'sweat shop'.
Finally the tailor comes up to you and rapidly takes multiple measurements of your body...writes it all down in a torn and massive book that somehow is able to distinguish between the customers. He tells you to come back tomorrow at 4pm.
You return at 4pm and are told to wait. 'My brother is bringing it from his shop-15 minutes only, have a seat.' And so you wait 15 minutes. Then another 15 After about an hour you ask the boss man where the top is. 'It's coming, only 10 minutes.' At this point you get irritated and want to punch someone or kick the sewing machines. Finally a bag shows up with my saree top and they still have to sew on some pieces. By 6pm I am able to leave.
Then comes the day I had to wear it all. My female coworkers came to my home to help me. After putting on the little saree top that is more like a bra than a shirt, I have put on the underskirt that has a strong string to hold the 3 meters of fabric for the saree. My coworkers had me stand while wrapping and pinning me to create the designs of the sarees I've seen so many other women wearing. At first I felt like it would become unraveled or fall off of me at any given moment-but eventually I got used to it. More than likely will never wear it again, but was happy for this experience.
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| Arrival of the bride and groom |
The wedding itself involved driving to the home of my colleagues parents. At least 100 of us gathered for the occassion, which was a lunch celebrating the welcoming of the newly wed couple. We sat in plastic chairs under tarps with the massive UNHCR logo on them. Upon arrival the sister of the colleague put a white and red marking on my forehead--same went for everyone. I know it was for some type of blessing, but not entirely sure which one.
We sat and were then fed lunch...lots of rice and curries. No forks or spoons. You eat with your hands here. I must admit I absolutely hate doing it. I turn into a mess everytime as I don't have the skill at balling up the rice and popping it into my mouth like the locals do. People are usually clearing their plates and I'm still playing with my rice wishing I had a spoon...I've gotten used to it now and am slowly but surely mastering it. It just feels odd, but I suppose that goes with learning any new culture.
After finishing everyone had an opportunity to have a professional photograph taken with the bride and groom. You were taken into a room and you lined up and had several photos taken together. This one is my favorite just in the fact that the little girl has a hysterical smile on her face.
